McGrady's Huskies Dog Cut-outs Project for Kids - ready to print and color
HangDog - play this word game
Kennel College Game - take interesting quizzes on dogs in seven groups from Herding Dogs to Toy Dogs to Working Dogs
Dog & Pet Coloringbook - ready to print & color
Puzzle for Kids with Famous Dogs
Virtual Dog - here's a free computer pooch you can adopt
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You know you are driving too fast when your dog looks like this...
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A dog had followed his owner to school. His owner was a fourth grader at a public elementary school. When the bell rang, the dog sidled inside the building and made it all the way to the child's classroom with him before a teacher noticed him and shoo'ed him back outside, and closing the door behind him. The dog sat down outside the door, whimpering and staring at the closed doors and not understanding in the least as to why he was refused entry. Then - God appeared beside the dog, patted him on the head to comfort him, and said, "Don't feel bad fella'.... they won't let ME in there either."
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Web mcgradyshuskies.bravehost.com
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A dog had followed his owner to school. His owner was a fourth grader at a public elementary school. When the bell rang, the dog sidled inside the building and made it all the way to the child's classroom with him before a teacher noticed him and shoo'ed him back outside, and closing the door behind him. The dog sat down outside the door, whimpering and staring at the closed doors and not understanding in the least as to why he was refused entry. Then - God appeared beside the dog, patted him on the head to comfort him, and said, "Don't feel bad fella'.... they won't let ME in there either."
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Jokes:
If the water on the inside of a fire hydrant is h2o, what is the water on the outside of the fire hydrant?
K9P
Best Single Ad
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This has to be one of the best singles ads ever printed.
It is reported to have been listed in The Atlanta Journal.
SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks male companionship, ethnicity
unimportant. I'm a very good looking girl who LOVES to play.
I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pickup truck,
hunting, camping, and fishing trips, cozy winter nights lying by
the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your
hand. I'll be at the front door when you get home from work;
wearing only what nature gave me. Call (404) 875-6420 and ask
for Daisy, I'll be waiting...
Over 15,000 men found themselves talking to the Atlanta Humane
Society about an 8-week-old black Labrador retriever.
Smart Dog
A dog walks into a butcher shop with a purse strapped around his neck. He walks up to the meat case and calmly sits there until it's his turn to be waited on. A man, who was already in the butcher shop, finished his purchase and noticed the dog. The butcher leaned over the counter and asked the dog what it wanted today. The dog put its paw on the glass case in front of the ground beef, and the butcher asked, 'How many pounds?'
The dog barked twice, so the butcher made a package of two pounds ground beef.
He then asked, Anything else?
The dog pointed to the pork chops, and the butcher asked, How many?
The dog barked four times, and the butcher made up a package of four pork chops.
The dog then walked around behind the counter, so the butcher could get at the purse. The butcher took out the appropriate amount of money and tied two packages of meat around the dog's neck.
The man, who had been watching all of this, decided to follow the dog. It walked for several blocks and then walked up to a house where it began to scratch the door to be let in. As the owner opened the door, the man said to the owner, That's a really smart dog you have there.
The owner said, He's not really all that smart. This is the second time this week he forgot his key.
The dead duck...
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she lay her
pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the
bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said,
"I'm so sorry, your pet has passed away."
The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?
"Yes, I'm sure. The duck is dead," he replied.
"How can you be so sure", she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any
testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few
moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked
on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the
examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked
at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog and took it out and returned a few moments later
with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed the
bird from its beak to its tail and back again. The cat sat back on its
haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, jumped down and strolled out of
the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is
most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys, and produced
a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock,
took the bill. "$150!" she cried. "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!"
The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would
have been $20. But what with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it all adds
up."
Thirteen things dogs don't understand
1.It's not a laugh to practice barking at 3a.m.
2. It's wrong to back Grandma into a corner and guard her.
3.He shouldn't jump on your bed when he's sopping wet.
4.The command "SHUT UP!" means just that
5. The cats have every right to be in the living room.
6. Crapping on the floor is not something deserving of a treat
7.Barking at guests 10 minutes after they arrive is stupid
8.No, we said SIT
9.I know its a nice leg, but don't ride it.
10. Getting up does NOT mean we are going for a walk
11. Just because I'm eating, doesn't mean you can.
12. If you look at me with those big soppy eyes, I'm not going to give in and feed you. NOT NOT NOT. Oh, ok, just this once.
13.No, it's my food....Oh alright then, just a small piece.
Dog Ethics
If you sit and stare at someone long enough, you will eventually get what you want.
Be direct with people: let them know exactly how you feel by piddling on their shoes.
Always give people a friendly greeting – a cold nose in the crotch is usally effective.
Don’t go out without I.D.
When you do something wrong, always take responsibility – as soon as you are dragged out from under the bed.
If it’s not we and sloppy – it’s not a REAL kiss.
When you go out into the world, always take time to smell the roses….the trees….the grass….the rocks….the street….the fire-hydrants…..
See how many of these statements apply to you and your dog.
You believe every dog is a lap dog.
If you are cold, you put a sweater on your dog.
You have a picture of your dog in your wallet, but not one of your kids.
You often claim that it was love at first sight with you and your dog.
You have your dog talk to your friends on the phone.
You can't fully enjoy yourself without your dog.
No matter how large your bed is, it is not large enough for you and your dog(s).
You spend more on clothes and food for your dog than you do for yourself.
You have no reservations about kissing your dog on the lips, even when you know where his lips have been.
You believe it is your duty to talk to, pat, and even feed every dog in the neighborhood. You know their names.
You let the neighbor dog sleep over.
You believe there is no such thing as a naughty dog.
Your vet and grooming bills exceed your rent.
When you need someone to talk to, your dog is your first choice.
You sit on the floor if the dog got in the chair first.
You talk to your dog when you are driving. He answers.
Your dog taught you to fetch and roll over
Dog Farts
A young man was delighted to finally be asked home to meet the parents of the young woman he'd been seeing for some time. He was quite nervous about the meeting, though, and by the time he arrived punctually at the doorstep he was in a state of gastric distress.
The problem developed into one of acute flatulence, and halfway through the canapés the young man realized he couldn't hold it in one second longer without exploding. A tiny fart escaped.
"SPOT!" called out the young woman's mother to the family dog, lying at the young man's feet.
Relieved at the dog's having been blamed, the young man let another, slightly larger one go. "Spot!" she called out sharply. "I've got it made," thought the fellow to himself. One more and I'll feel fine. So he let loose a really big one.
"Spot!" shrieked the mother. "Get over here before he craps on you!"
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bravenet.com